5 Ways to Manage Stress on Your Own

Stress is the number one cause of health problems, and a lot of people are grappling with it right now. The state of the world, the transitions after the pandemic, and the general anxieties of life can cause us to feel more stress than we’re used to.

What exactly is stress and how can we respond to it?

Stress is a change or adjustment that causes you to feel some discomfort physically, emotionally, or psychologically. You might experience changes in mood, appetite or sleep, headaches, or low energy. Here are 5 ways you can manage stress on your own.

Change your situation. When you feel stressed, it is important that you recognize there’s a problem and make a decision about what needs to change. This can look like making a decision to leave a situation, jump into a situation, downsize a situation, or upsize a situation. This can be easier said than done. Making a decision can be the most challenging part. You may fear that your decision will disappoint somebody. If you're struggling to make a change, be curious about why. Who are you afraid that you’re going to disappoint? Why are you afraid that they’re going to be disappointed? What is your struggle with choosing yourself over disappointing someone else?
Change your response. Instead of getting overwhelmed by the situation, think about how you can get through it. Consider what resources or people you have that can help you in this situation. Sometimes you might not be able to change the situation swiftly. Your mind and your heart have to be on the same page before you exit a situation. If you can’t change the situation itself, consider what you can change around it. For example, if you can’t change your work, consider what you can do differently before you go to work and after you come home. Do things that make you smile or bring you comfort. It can be as simple as making a cup of tea or sitting outside.
Learn how to say no. You may have heard that “No” is a complete sentence. It’s true! If you are feeling stressed, consider saying “I’m not going to be able to do that,” “It’s not a great time for me,” “I’m not going to be able to help you,” or “That sounds like fun, but I’m not going to be able to make it” without any further explanations. If you explain the reason to people, they may try to debate with you. If saying no feels challenging for you, be curious about your inability to say no. What is it about saying no that makes you feel bad? Why do you feel uncomfortable setting boundaries to put yourself first?
Be mindful of your environment. Your environment either feeds you or depletes you. It can’t make you happy all of the time, but overall, it can impact how you feel. Consider who you are spending your time with and where that time is spent. You might need to make some changes to protect your peace.
Be aware of your unmet expectations. Limiting unnecessary stress requires you to be proactive and understand what stresses you out. Oftentimes our stress comes from having expectations about a situation or person that we haven’t communicated with. To manage your stress, check your unmet expectations. Have you clearly identified and communicated what you’re looking for in a situation or from a person? When you identify what stresses you out, find ways to say no to that stressor or ask for help. Surround yourself with people who can support you. And again, if that feels challenging, be curious about your inability to ask for help or reach out.

There are times when our stress is beyond what we can manage on our own. Here are 5 signs that it’s time to seek professional help.

Managing your own stress doesn’t seem to help.
Your work or relationships suffer for an extended period of time.
Your drug and alcohol consumption increases.
Your eating or sleeping habits change.
You are withdrawing from friends or not wanting to engage in activities.

When it comes to managing your stress, I hope you feel empowered to make uncomfortable decisions if they’re going to bring you peace. Learn how to say no, watch your environment, and be very aware of your unmet expectations. Get curious about your fears and find a way to prioritize your mental health. You’re worth it.